My darling mom needs a holiday by the sea.

Yesterday was a lovely day, although somewhat tinged with sadness. Hubby and I went off up the hill to meet my sister, my mom, and two of mom’s dearest friends, Marge and Tom. We met at a local restaurant, and it just broke my heart to see how difficult it was for my once strong and independent mother to even manoeuvre herself from her walker, into her seat. Since her bout of pneumonia late last year, she has become so frail and her mind is very confused. She did manage a cappuccino and half a slice of carrot cake, and we all kept up a lively conversation, trying to include her, but I could tell that her mind wasn’t able to process what was being said, and it was obvious that the bright lighting and ambient noise were bothering her. Tom is younger than mom, and has been a wonderful help to her, after she had to give up driving her car a couple of years ago. He used to take her shopping and to church every week. Marge, who has been her best friend for many years, was so attentive and kind, helping her to get the cake onto her fork, and opening the sugar packet for her. She is 91, a couple of years older than mom, but really bright and capable.

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We took mom back to the care home, and helped to put her to bed, as she was so tired after her little outing. The people who work there are really kind, and I’m happy to know that she is so well cared for, but I find it really distressing to see how little she can do for herself. When I think of the lively, bustling mom who brought me up, now so vulnerable and utterly dependent on other people to do everything for her, I could weep.

As we came over the brow of the hill, and were on the downhill run to home, I decided that what I needed was a long walk by the sea.

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The sound of the waves crashing over the rocks, was somehow very soothing to my troubled mind.

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Soon we were on our way to the lighthouse, the sight of which never fails to lift my spirits.

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Next stop was the pier, which although quite a new addition, looks like it’s been there forever.

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A sprinkling of fishermen were on the beach at the end of the promenade, and we sat for a while, in quiet contemplation, just looking out to sea.

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I was thinking that mom would really enjoy a mini vacation by the sea, and although our house has quite steep stairs, just maybe, with me in front and hubby bringing up the rear, we could manage to get her up and down them. It’s worth a try, so when we get back from visiting our daughter in Johannesburg in a couple of weeks’ time, we’re going to attempt it. I’m looking forward to the challenge.

I wish you all a very happy weekend.

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110 comments on “My darling mom needs a holiday by the sea.

  1. Dear Sylvia,
    It makes me blink back the tears to read your post. My mom was 66 when I lost her, but I had to watch her deteriorate over the last months of her illness, and the helplessness is a terrible feeling. It’s a blessing that you are close enough to your mom to visit.
    I am flying my aunt and sister out to Seattle in June. She is in a wheelchair, but my sister will see her safely here, and she looks forward to it for months. We always take her to plays and to see the sights, but she would be as happy to simply sit in the company of family members who love her. If you take your mom to the seaside and give her that time, you will never regret it.
    Best wishes to you all.

    • Thank you so much for your kind words, Naomi. I’m so sorry that you lost your mom at such a young age. I’m sure your aunt will really benefit from her visit with family. It’s always good to have something exciting to look forward to. My sister is bringing mom down for lunch next Sunday. 🙂

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